6 Ways to Overcome Loneliness

Albert Kwok

Albert Kwok

MEd, Registered Clinical Counsellor #1734

Loneliness is a universal human experience that transcends age, gender, and cultural boundaries. It’s a silent struggle that many of us face at some point in our lives, yet it’s often misunderstood and stigmatized.

Loneliness is a common phenomenon that has been on the rise in recent years. Despite the increase in online connectivity, an alarming number of people report feeling lonely. In addition, the COVID-19 pandemic has significantly altered our ways of connecting with long-lasting ramifications, adding to the phenomenon of loneliness. 

Understanding Loneliness

Loneliness is more than just being physically alone. It’s a complex emotional state characterized by a sense of emptiness, disconnectedness, and a longing for meaningful social connection. It can be acute or chronic, stemming from various sources, including:

  1. Social Isolation: Sometimes, loneliness is a result of physical isolation, where we lack social connection due to circumstances like living alone, working remotely, or moving to a new city.
  2. Emotional Isolation: Even in the presence of others, one can feel emotionally isolated if they lack deep, meaningful connections. Surface-level interactions may leave people feeling unfulfilled and lonely. Moreover, fear of being authentic due to perceived judgments from others may prevent one from being fully connected.
  3. Life Transitions: Major life changes such as divorce, retirement, or the loss of a loved one can trigger loneliness. These events disrupt one’s social routines and support networks.
  4. Technology and Social Media: While technology connects us in many ways, it can also contribute to loneliness when we prioritize virtual interactions over real-life connections.


Health Impact of Loneliness

Loneliness isn’t just a mental state; it can have profound effects on our physical health.

Chronic loneliness has been linked to increased stress levels, inflammation, high blood pressure, and a weakened immune system. Over time, it can contribute to the development of chronic diseases and decreased life expectancy.

Why We Isolate Ourselves and Become Lonely

It’s essential to understand that loneliness is not a sign of weakness or failure; it’s a natural human emotion that can be managed and overcome with the right strategies and support.

In my professional experience, I’ve seen that the lack of deeper connections comes from fear of failure and judgment from others. So, ask yourself, is my loneliness the result of me isolating myself to feel safer, so I won’t potentially be judged by others or look like a failure in front of them?

When we begin to understand why we are fearful of being open and vulnerable with others, we can begin to make those meaningful connections with others. Getting to a point of self-acceptance can be a vehicle for understanding yourself better without the fear of judgment, which will also allow others to know you better.  Here are some strategies on how to overcome loneliness.

Strategies to Overcome Loneliness

  1. Build Meaningful Relationships: Invest time and effort in building deep, meaningful connections with others. Quality matters more than quantity when it comes to social interactions. As mentioned earlier, connect with others who appreciate you for your authenticity instead of changing to fit in.
  2. Reach Out: Don’t be afraid to initiate social contact. Take the initiative to reconnect with old friends or acquaintances and be open to making new friends.
  3. Limit Screen Time: While technology can be a useful tool, it’s essential to balance virtual interactions with real-life connections. Set boundaries on your screen time to prioritize face-to-face interactions.
  4. Join Groups and Activities: Engaging in hobbies, clubs, or volunteering can be a great way to meet new people who share your interests.
  5. Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself and recognize that loneliness is a common human experience. Don’t blame yourself for feeling lonely; instead, take proactive steps to address it.
  6. Seek Professional Help: If loneliness is overwhelming and persistent, don’t hesitate to seek support from a therapist or counsellor. They can provide valuable guidance and strategies to cope with loneliness.


Life is not to be lived in isolation. We are created for connection. If you are feeling lonely, know that it doesn’t have to be this way. The team at Brentwood Counselling Centre is here to support you. Contact us today.

Woman sitting alone at the end of a dock on a cloudy day. Ways to overcome loneliness.

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